


Avenoir

by cloudsane



Category: Psycho-Pass
Genre: Angst, Eventual Sex, F/M, Fluff, One Shot, Psycho-Pass (Movie), Sad, Sudden plot twist, cuteness, kinda follows the movie plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-07
Updated: 2019-10-07
Packaged: 2020-11-26 20:50:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,658
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20936549
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cloudsane/pseuds/cloudsane
Summary: Akane's encounter with Kogami on her mission to Southeast Asia is filled with many emotions, and she realizes she may have fallen for him a little harder than she anticipated.





	Avenoir

**Author's Note:**

> Ayo, it me! this was supposed to be a short lil one shot but I always get carried away haha ldfhslkhd. the movie is kind of a lot and I just felt like it would've been more effective to build up to the main point of my story, rather than just wrap it up quickly for the sake of writing too much. anyways, I don't own any characters or psycho-pass itself, just writing this for entertainment, as always :~) xoxo enjoy luv

_ i hope they didn't get your mind _  
_ your heart is too strong anyway_  
_ we need to fetch back the time_  
_ they have stolen from us_

* * *

From the bolted, rectangular window of the 20-1101, the clouds sifted throughout the sullen, gray atmosphere, layering the skies thickly to a depth in which the entire plane was surrounded in a lugubrious fog.

Akane thought deeply about the words she’d received from Saiga. As she stared at the beautiful yet disenchanting sight, one palm cupping her chin gently, she realized that it was becoming ever more difficult to suppress the alleged evidence at hand. But she was not what one would consider blinkered. There was more beneath the surface, she knew beyond any doubt.

A more fragile part of her was anxious beyond her understanding. Each time a dull, reoccurring apprehension stabbed at her senses, she did her best to pay it no heed, reminding herself that if she failed to carry through with her instincts, her life for the past three years would have, to a certain extent, been an exhausting waste of time.

And as if on cue, her mind was stuck picturing exactly how each word looked between the printed blue lines, the pattern of the ink on the paper, the faint smudges on a period or the tail-end of a letter. She read that letter, over and over and over, processing a new emotion each time she compelled her eyes to uncover it. If her life depended on the matter, she could recite it perfectly without any flaws. It nearly seemed as if she had eased herself into studying it, convincing her obstinate mind that if she read it just once more, things would finally become clear and she would understand.

But no matter the number of times she went over it, she was always left in a state of bleak incertitude. She liked to believe that his memory to her had grown evermore vague but her restless brain at some point confirmed that she was unable to let it be for what it was. And still, persisting on in the back of her subconscious was the impending awareness that she never lost sight of that letter simply because she missed an old associate, someone that she was supposed to have forgotten about years ago. Although simply forgetting, she'd learned, didn't necessarily imply that all personal emotions would cease to exist as well.

She always reprimanded herself in secret for that particular hunch, but Akane held enough balance between her professionalism and personal sentiments to understand that she could never allow her raw feelings to get in the way of upholding the law.

She understood that way before today when she held that giant, solid piece of forbidden metal beneath her fingertips as reminiscences of the barbaric events that unfolded on the first night she met Makashima frolicked through her memories.

Every ounce of tenacity in her spirit yearned for her to cease her actions before it was too late, though all she could picture was driving that carefully crafted, highly intelligent piece of technology into his skull. She wanted him to pay in an oddly callous, sadistic way, which should have alarmed her deeply. But it did not.

Not once had Akane ever wished death upon another human being, but she truly felt as though Makashima deserved every bit of pain and unrest that he caused to the foundation of society. At least, at the time that was the case.

Still, in spite of everything he did, she could never bring herself to go outside of the system to achieve justice.

Even when she could feel her heartbeat in her throat, adrenaline coursing through her veins while profound tears of repugnance brimmed on her eye sockets and spilled out onto her cheeks.

She could still recall that moment like it was yesterday, thrusting the helmet down beside his white head in a blind rage, reaching for her badge instead. Sometimes she wondered what would’ve happened if she did kill him that night. She'd never considered how simple it could have been. Though she would have only gained temporary gratification. She was rational enough to know that rash decisions were almost always accompanied by repercussions. Yet, on the other hand, Akane was typically never one to only consider a situation from one perspective. Every experience held some sort of constructive value in her mind contrary to what it was presenting, whether it be the leading cause in personal fulfillment and happiness or the worst circumstances she'd ever had to encounter.

She wondered if she had failed that night. A valuable life perished at the expense of her lack of autonomy.

Maybe in a sense, Makashima was allowing her to prove herself. Yet she'd been too blinded by the promise of a perfect system to accept that killing him would have eradicated any major issues later. But that felt almost too easy — it would have been a mindless decision that would have been counterproductive in the end.

Nevertheless, if she would have ended him that night, she would have been no better than one of his counterparts, acting out of utter vengeance in some unforeseen duty to reform the world through acts of terrorism and force, instead of carrying out her duty as a detective and bringing him down through the apparatus of government that same world put their trust into.  
  
Much to her relief, her string of thoughts was momentarily interrupted as the plane jolted abruptly, letting her palm slip from underneath her chin with the turbulence of the aircraft. Her mind was still a mystery to her, and she decided that be her cue not to put any more energy into trying to understand her abstract beliefs. Letting her head rest against the thick glass of the window, she closed her eyes and felt herself fade into a wary slumber.

* * *

After meeting with the Chairman and the captain of the Union Military Police Force, Akane was grateful to have a few moments to herself through all of the events that had taken place in the past day. She prepared to remove her blazer but suspended the action when a soft rap on her door caught her by surprise. When she'd opened it, a young, promising lady with dark, braided hair and a friendly smile stood before her.

"Hello, I'll be your attendant during your visit here. If there's anything you need, please don't hesitate to ask me." She seemed timid but kind. As she spoke, something in her voice struck Akane as uncanny until she realized that it was not her voice that was odd, but the piece of equipment taut around her throat.

_"Those poor souls are latent criminals. Depending on the person's level of stress, the collar will either eject a paralyzer or a lethal dose of poison."_

It was like the government here did not need human intervention at all when it came to the judgment of another person's psycho pass. Leaving the most vital decision as to whether they got to live or die up to a piece of complex technology seemed virtually barbaric. Most would contend that Japan's advanced weaponry could be judged on the same scale, but at least the Dominator ensured that some discernment on such measure was left for man to decide themselves, and to Akane that was the most important part of it all.

But she only nodded and smiled, mumbling a quiet “thank you” of acceptance. She couldn't let herself get distracted by being a saint. She was here for one reason, and one reason only.

* * *

Akane had taken it upon herself to accompany Wong on a military operation the following day, seeing as there was a propitious likelihood she would encounter her old enforcer. The pretentious man gave her specific orders to observe quietly and remain out of the way, but she knew her true intentions would come to light once the moment presented itself. Watching from behind a narrow split between the seats, she stared half with splendor and bemusement at the blinking red dots on the LED screen.

One of the men riding up front had been monitoring the area of the SEAUn's old capital city for any sudden or unusual signs, to which Wong and his crew were met with unwavering mercy as each drone's connection suddenly went offline.

"That's one more. Someone's shooting our drones down."

"It's him," Wong uttered with unequivocal certainty. Such an acute assumption barely needed confirmation. In the midst of all that was going on, one look at his face on that monitor proved all she needed to spring out of her seat and leap towards the back doors, thrusting them open.

“I’ll be back,” She vaguely offered a gesture of reassurance, even though it wasn’t true.

She knew it was an unauthorized move, and the look on Wong's face as she'd made her break told her that things wouldn't be all too grand later, but she couldn't bring herself to ignore her inclinations.

Without stalling for an answer, Akane made her way towards the nearest fort. She entered the structure briskly, her footsteps thudding lightly against the frigid concrete. The air hung thick within the musty walls, humid and sticky. A thin layer of perspiration had formed on small but powerful shoulders and beneath the layer of her bulletproof vest. Another bead of sweat rolled down the side of her temple.

She moved swiftly, to throw off any other possible occupants that could have already been inside of the building. Among the large, rusted columns, the inside was littered with various pieces of old furniture, equipment, and items that were no longer of value, which provided sound, irregular hiding spots. From behind a wooden chair, she leered through the cross rails at the stale interior, met with no other signs of movement or sounds. With caution, she advanced when she presumed all to be secure, unsuspecting of the body that waited to ambush her seconds later.

The force seized her by her upper arm from behind as she sprinted by, forcing a breath of unanticipated surprise, but her reaction time was nothing short of astute. Unwilling to be restrained, she wrenched herself free despite the pressure from the knee that was now being drilled into her lower back as she struggled. Spinning around quickly to hook her forearm underneath the back of the assailant's knee, she jerked it in an upward motion as her other arm grabbed hold of their torso in an effort to flip them off of their feet. Her plan was only half successful, as the opponent counteracted her attack and twisted around behind her in midair, reaching for the back of her vest. Upon this action, she released her grip to avoid being hauled down, somersaulting on the rough ground a few feet away from the attacker with her weapon drawn.

Instantaneously, she loosened her two-hand grasp on the grip of the pistol as the sight of her long-sought first subordinate kneeling only a few feet away from her, alive and fairly unscathed, defeated her will to fire. The huge course of adrenaline flowing throughout her body was subsiding rapidly as she took in his features. She was speechless, incandescent. Notwithstanding the verification that this was indisputably Shinya Kogami, she forced herself not to lower the gun.

Rays of sunlight beamed through the fissures of the tall, dry-rotted ceiling, illuminating the two in a golden-yellow luminous, encapsulating the moment in perfect juncture.

The male in front of her was slimmer compared to the last time they’d been together but still maintained a firm and trim form. His usually fair skin had now begun to tan ever so slightly, making his thick, windswept strands appear even darker against it. His new appearance was rather intoxicating in a strangely evocative way and for a moment, she dwelled on their first encounter as inspector and enforcer.

“Well, look who it is. I'm impressed."

His tone was as stoic as ever, but the slightly upturned corners of his mouth revealed a hint of restrained amusement at having been ambushed by his former partner and colleague.

“So this is what you’re all about now, huh?” Akane questioned him immediately, unable to prevent the disagreement fuming in her voice as she remembered that Kogami was no longer a detective or an enforcer, but a solider.

“Don’t tell me you came all this way just to see what I was up to.” He seemed smug, given the position that he was in.

“Sorry, but that's exactly why I'm here. You appeared in a memory scoop for an investigation on one of the men after an attack on Japan, and it aroused suspicion. I received permission to travel over here to investigate you personally, maybe even arrest you.”

"Hang on, what are you talking about? What attack?" He staggered, eyes narrowing.

"The foreign terrorists that infiltrated Japan using highly advanced military apparatus-" out of the corner of her eye, she could spot the shape and texture of a grenade rolling towards their direction, jolting the two from their confounding reunion to send their greater sense of focus to acutely zero in on the new intrusion. As they both turned to look at the small, ovoid explosive, the last thing her eyes beheld before the device combusted was Kogami lunging to grab at her wrist, pulling her away from the closer proximity of the bomb and down onto the concrete, using his body to shield hers.

For a split-second, the inspector's vision went black and her mind went void of the foregoing few moments of her life, ears ringing and pulsing. The weight on top of her back was lifted succeeding the blast. In the distance, she could hear the mechanical trudging of a drone, annihilating everything in its path to get to its most important targets. She pushed herself up to her feet just as another explosion resonated throughout the building, foreseeing that she had no other choice but to go with him as she ran to catch up. The thought filled her with an onset of curiosity and optimism.

They came to a stopping point, an uneven ledge that led down another direction away from the ruins of the areas that the drone had destroyed. Kogami grunted faintly as he hoisted himself onto a concrete landing, offering to pull her up alongside him with an outstretched hand. Without question, she reached out to place her palm in his, lifting herself once she was able to place a knee on the solid platform. Behind them, the building was beginning to collapse, rusted pillars falling in on themselves as pieces of the ceiling crumbled before breaking into concrete chunks the size of boulders.

Now that they were precisely on separate sides, alleged enemies, if you will, she could've been considered a criminal herself for "conspiring with a terrorist." Even though time had put the better half of distance between them, she could tell he hadn’t changed a bit. And if there was one thing she knew about him, it was that he wasn't a terrorist.

Silently, they made their escape without giving the prior conversation any second thoughts.

* * *

At last, they finally sat alone in the confines of his compact room within the base camp. It contained nothing more than what was needed for survival; a bed, a dresser, a table, and a few chairs. There was an odd sense of displacement about the atmosphere, impeding, potent energy. Wordlessly, Kogami placed a mug in front of her, their eyes scanning over one another in strained silence.

She left it and its contents untouched, averting her eyes to the male who sat opposite of her scouring his pocket for what she instantly surmised to be a cigarette and a lighter.

"How are things back in Japan? Hopefully Gino's still the tightass he's always been."

In any other situation, Akane would have welcomed small talk with her past collaborator, but right now it was like nails on a chalkboard to the disorient in her brain.

“What the hell are you doing, Kogami?”

An interjection that he was most unsuspecting of.

He hadn’t considered this question in retrospect, and hearing the split-second of disappointment in her soft yet stern voice was chastening, but he did his best not to show it. Such a subtle, familiar defense mechanism whenever he felt like someone was trying to get him to talk about himself.

“I can’t really answer that, inspector.”

Another string of silence plagued both of them while she observed the way he continued to rummage in his pocket, growing increasingly agitated before finally reaching into her own and pulling out an unopened pack of Spinels, audibly setting them down on the wooden surface between them.

His colorless eyes looked once at the box of cigarettes and next to her hardened expression that hadn't left his being once. Beneath her resilient and seemingly unbreakable exterior, he knew just what she was thinking and he couldn't say that he blamed her for it.

“Don't."

It was a single word, but it was all he could manage for the time being.

She remained close-mouthed. She didn't need to speak for him to know how badly it vexed her to see that he had given up everything he had in the PSB for a lifestyle like this. Even so, he didn't feel the need to justify himself — it wasn't in his character to make anyone understand any personal motives but himself. But something in her eyes broke him.

"Don't do that to me." 

He ventured to look away from her disheartened leer as he spoke.

“Are you out of your mind-“

“What do you want me to say, Akane?” a hasty interruption, his voice sharp and piercingly numb, prevented her from speaking any longer. At this, she was unsure of how to proceed, brows furrowed, mind befuddled. The crinkling of the shrinkwrap around the carton of cigarettes only agitated her further as he so nonchalantly proceeded to salvage a single stick, as if he were trying to drown out the very stillness of the air around them.

"Did you send those terrorists to Japan?" She suddenly burst incautiously, as if she'd been consumed with that precise question the entire time, reigniting her initial interrogation.

"They went on their own." He spoke succinctly, claiming a lighter from his pocket before cupping his hand around the unlit cigarette that hung from his lip.

"So you led them then?" She pressed on, unwavering.

"Some spoke of rebelling against Japan, and it was disagreed upon, but I couldn't stop them from going.”

A dense cloud of smoke filled the space between them as he exhaled, fleeting slowly.

"I've never taken you for someone to be dishonest."

"Do you think I'm lying to you, inspector?" He quipped, a smile pulling at the corners of his mouth as he took another drag.

Akane may have been trusting, but she wasn't naive. There were likely a million things Kogami willfully wasn't telling her, and she honestly didn't care to know; all she needed was for him to confirm that he wasn't killing innocent people. At that, she was able to lessen her grip on the belief that he had turned completely rogue. She may not have been able to stop him from pursuing his goals in whatever way he saw fit for himself, but it eased her mind to know that he hadn't forgotten where he came from.

"No." She finally answered, brief as it was. Ironic enough, she'd felt like the one being dishonest. This entire time she'd been ignoring the signs her subconscious was giving her, but as the evening wore on, she knew their time together was most likely coming to an end. Whether permanently or not, she knew they wouldn't reunite again for an exceptional amount of time after tonight. She had to say it. Her internal thoughts were eating her alive and she couldn't stand to let herself shove it down any longer. There was no Sibyl System here to intervene. As she prepared the grit to finally, for once, be vulnerable, his voice postponed her line of thought with something more relevant to her investigation.

"It's fucked up and you know it." Another gust of smoke shrouded him from her vision, but once it had dissipated, they were left staring at each other once more from across the table. His eyes were on her, but he seemed as if he were reflecting upon abominable matters that she was unable to witness, one of his many idiosyncrasies. "These men needed guidance."

"What are you talking about?" Akane questioned him with a new curiosity, venturing to uncover more information.

"I'm talking about Chairman Han, Shambala Float. Something's not right," he ground the cigarette to a stub before continuing, "we thought Sybil would have left him powerless once he realized what he was up against, but his continued involvement likely means he's using the system to his advantage, and innocent people are dying in the process. There's something that we're missing between his connection with Sybil, but we can't give up until he's brought to justice."

"So your idea of justice is steering clear of the law and bringing him down by whatever means necessary to fill some void of self-gratification?" Her voice was characteristically composed, although the inquiry was nothing short of a patronizing criticism.

"You sure don't hold back now."

"And you're still as stubborn as I remember."

Their conversation was cut short when he claimed to have something he needed to attend to, rising from the table.

"You can stay here tonight. I'll have someone escort you back to Shambala Float in the morning."

The phrase caught her off guard, unsure of how to react as she averted a nonplussed gaze over in his direction. Suggesting she stay the night, in her mind, was the worst and best thing he'd said to her since her arrival here.

"Don't worry, I won’t do anything you don’t want me to." His backside was already facing her, but she could tell he wore a suggestive smirk by the way he glanced over his shoulder. It was a simple jest, but in her current state, she couldn’t invalidate that the phrase gave her butterflies. He seemed intrigued by her unexpected mute acknowledgment. As he left, she was subdued to ponder her earlier sequence of thoughts alone.

* * *

That night he let her use his bed, and he laid on a makeshift, uncomfortable cot that he formed with the two wooden chairs. She'd removed her vest, belt, and shoes but kept everything else in-tact, in case they were interrupted through the night. She cursed herself for not saying anything sooner, in a less intimate setting. Anything she said now would seem like pillow-talk, though that didn't seem to diverge her from speaking anyway. She had already made up her mind and the opportunity may have never graced her path again.

From the short distance on the other side of the room, she laid on her side with her face towards the concrete wall, following its crevices and slits blankly with her eyes.

"Can I be honest with you if you promise you won't look at me any differently?"

Her voice was a foreign noise to her ears as the question emerged from her meek lips.

"Yeah." He didn't seem confused, or at the least amused. His voice was gravelly while he mumbled, and she presumed that he'd been between the edge of sleep and the conscious world.

"I just...I wish you were here. And not _here_, but with me...or us, I guess. I miss you.”

After she'd said it, she contemplated if it had seemed too ambiguous or not. But at least it was honest. She couldn’t bring herself to view him as unfavorably as she wanted to, as the “hunting dog” he was so often referred to as per Ginoza.  
  
She wasn't even sure what it was that drew her to him — some irresistible, dangerous magnetism — but she knew without a shadow of a doubt that she felt it and she couldn't lie to him any longer. Whatever that made their relationship was no longer up for her to decide.

After her confession, she was tortured with silence, as she expected. For a second, she felt an intense wave of dire nostalgia for her days as a teenager, before she even knew of Kogami's existence. Simpler days that didn't involve death and war and politics, and unrequited feelings. There was no favorable chance that they'd cross paths somewhere down the road later and she knew it; the circumstances of this life just didn't permit. It never did.

"You don't have to say anything, I just wanted you to know. I think I've been waiting three years to say that," her brittle voice cracked while she forced a self-deprecating chuckle, swallowing the lump forming in her throat. He remained quiet and she wondered for a moment if he'd fallen asleep. She wouldn't have been offended or in the least upset, for then she could have let her piteous tears roll in peace. But a faint response in the dark a few minutes after had confirmed that he hadn't left yet.

"I have to remind myself that I have nothing in this world now, not even you. Sometimes I ask myself if it was worth it."

At his unexpected response of cryptic mutuality, her tears were choking her and the hard knot in her throat was becoming painful. All willpower that had compelled her to keep them inside was breaking. She felt no other option but to let them roam free, biting her lip hard enough to leave a nick to keep from making any sounds of distress, even though it was all in vain. She wasn't expecting anything from him, not even an explanation. All she wanted was for him to comprehend her feelings and thoughts and complexities.

"You better not be crying over me, Akane." He bantered her in a softer context, attempting to keep the mood light, but she knew he was only doing it for her sake. She mewled a small utterance of protest vaguely through her tears, but to no purpose, as her voice was barely a discernible whisper. He wasn't good for her, but she was good for him. She kept him balanced, leveled, awakened a side of him that he neglected eminently. If anything, he needed her more than she needed him. But she was ethereal, dynamic, flowing, devoted, reasonable — everything that he was not. He was undeserving of somebody so resilient after what he'd put her through, deceitful as he was. There was a gray area of his subconscious that was consumed with the theory that she had come here to reconcile her feelings, but it seemed unlikely for the inspector to act so out of character. Even so, it prompted him to stand directly in the face of his own, coaxing him into a corner of his mind to which he couldn't escape from once he'd seen its innermost workings. It was an unfamiliar sentiment not felt at a great depth until he'd recalled the unreserved defeat in her voice when she'd spoken earlier. For a flash of a passing thought, even if he were only convincing himself to feel this way to alleviate some of the guilt from abandoning her, remorse was all that his mind had to offer for all of how he betrayed her.

“I’m sorry.”

A familiar set of words, but they meant nothing to her by now. They did not offer tranquility from her roaring thoughts.

“You don’t mean it, though. Do you?”

Upon her accusation, he hated himself for assuming she would have accepted something so mundane. But he wasn’t sure what she wanted from him. Her purpose couldn’t have been to avoid her main mission and put her life at stake all in pursuit of seeking him out individually just to make him feel like shit.

There was a creak from the other side of the room as he arose on the wooden chairs, his now boot-less feet rendering him almost silent as he slipped his way rather submissively over to his bed where she lay. There was no telling where his actions would lead, but here there was no system to answer to. Only raw emotion. She remained still, palms concealing her tear-stained, tired face. He placed a sizeable hand cautiously on her back, rubbing it gently as if he were afraid of shattering her delicate body. The gesture was innocent yet affectionate, and he instantly understood how long it had been since he'd felt any kind of genuine intimacy toward another person.

Her next direction of action took him by surprise as she grabbed his forearm to pull him down, indicating that she wanted him to occupy the narrow space behind her. He was nothing short of compliant, not bothering to question if he had misread her intentions. He slipped his arm mindlessly around her waist to draw her in towards his chest, feeling her against him as he buried his face in the back of her neck. Her homely, feminine scent was intoxicating to him after his senses had become so used to smelling things less pleasant at the base camp. It unlocked a softer side of his emotions, the side of himself that he kept dormant. It was refreshing to just _feel_, to escape such a colorless world that was imposed on humanity.

Even with the disadvantageous circumstances that would surely produce undesired attachment and unfathomable nostalgia, it felt genuine. No one needed validation or approval; there was no facade to put on to appear any stronger in the face of suffering. It felt human, nothing more, nothing less.

"We could just run away, you know." She verbalized her internal thoughts sarcastically, although her tone didn't convey the same earnest her mind did.

"Now you sound like me," Kogami mumbled flatly on her skin. "I'm nothing special. You shouldn't put yourself in a position to miss me."

"It’s a little late for that." Akane prompted, her voice unintentionally coy as she slowly stroked the surface of his forearm with her fingertips, nuzzling her backside a little deeper into his groin. He tensed for half a second as she brushed up against his lower half, oblivious to her impending provocative gesture. Her initial actions weren’t meant to be crass, and neither were his, but the feeling of her body lined comfortably against his revitalized a sensation he hadn't felt in a long, dead while. In spite of the dispassionate last few years of his life, he had enough presence of mind to respect any boundaries he perceived she would have, keeping his hand a comfortable distance away from her lower body.

Yet his wariness was not reciprocated. She nearly tingled at the sensation of his arm around her waist as he enfolded her from behind. She took it upon herself to shift to face his direction instead, unexpectedly surprised when the tip of her nose graced his and he did not budge. The unwavering hard line of his mouth made her giggle under the context of their position. At her laughter, he cracked a smile.

"What?" He chuckled softly, eyes crinkled fondly.

"Nothing. You're just cute."

For a second, Akane envisaged the idea of throwing herself on top of him, mashing her lips onto his while she ran her fingers through his unkempt hair. They both knew what their circumstances yielded and how this night would end if they went any further. But it seemed she could not stop herself from carefully grinding her lips softly against his, testing his reaction. He hissed softly through his teeth, much to unexpected arousal as she caught his bottom lip in a light graze, her tongue flicking the tender flesh. They were both well aware of what her racy endeavor and his failure to negatively react suggested. He'd acted mindlessly several times throughout his life on various occasions for an odd number of reasons, but this was one thing that he'd thought about long, and hard. At this, he felt it unnecessary to restrain himself any longer, sliding a once-gracious hand down to the dip of her waist, squeezing forcefully.

She squealed at having been handled in such an unfamiliar manner.

"What are you doing?" a whisper erupted from her lips, instilled with a sudden sense of stupefaction, but it was fleeting.

"What are _yo__u_ doing?" he questioned her with the same exhibition, looking as though he were confounded. Eyes stared down one another knowingly as they temporarily postponed any movements, waiting to see who would take the initiative. The corners of her mouth began to uplift into a beguiling smirk, and Kogami perceived this as an invitation to resume.

Watching as he sat up and pulled his shirt forward overtop his head was hardly a revelation. She knew what that chest looked like, and how long she'd waited to finally touch it. They both knew this moment was immensely overdue.  
  
As she reached out to embrace the grandeur before her, his hand swiftly grabbed her wrists and restrained them above her head with a single grasp, much to her titillated desires.

"Ladies first." His whispering voice faded alluringly with the way his fingers slithered down her forearms, arousing her beyond belief.

"Plea-" an index finger against her lips hushed her whimpering voice. He spoke to her with his eyes this time, which seemed pearly in the lowlight of the thick walls. He seduced her further and further with his gentle motions, fingertips marking every inch of her clothed chest until she couldn't take it anymore and set about to remove it herself.

After that moment, it had seemed that each of them abandoned their tender, slow maneuvers to be gentle with each other. Ignited by another sudden kiss, Kogami wasted no time loosening his belt and unlacing it from the loops it was supported by, discarding it in some unknown location of the room. Once they'd parted, his fingers found their ferocity again as he tugged the cotton of her half-sleeved shirt up above her breasts that were still concealed by her bra. The ease in which he'd unhooked the garment made her question just how many times he'd gotten to practice on others who were not her. The thought distracted her temporarily, the feeling of his warm, soft lips on her nipple bringing her back to actuality.

A light gasp from his former superior prompted an advance in his actions, rough fingers fumbling to undo the buttons on her pants. Her smooth, ivory flesh soon became another element for which to fuel his primal instincts, barely pulling the garment down to her mid-thighs before he clutched her skin beneath his fingertips. Her panties were a simple yet appealing shade of Egyptian blue; he was convinced that she'd be just as attractive in any other hue.

Those were not his main concern, however, too consumed with the way her silken thighs conformed to his palm to worry about something so minuscule. The sensual side of her covertly envisioned the way he would carry himself when consumed by desire. Yet even with his initial boisterous and aggressive conduct, she could still feel that he was keeping his true inclinations at bay.

"Do whatever you want to me." The phrase was astonishing on his part, but not unwelcome. He couldn't help but offer a sly curl of his lip at her over-confidence.

"I don't think you'd survive." His response was conveyed as half a joke, but Akane's stomach was in a flutter at the idea of things Kogami had mused of doing to her. Slamming her against the wall in sexual greed, pulling her hair and calling her dirty names while he used her and only her as a means of getting off. Telling her that she was his, making her say it...how good that would have felt. Yet she did not belong to him, nor he to her. At least for now, she could fool herself into thinking they'd be together forever.

The last of their clothes had ultimately been tossed away, entrusting them to act on fulfilling each other in a mutual consensus of long-awaited copulation. He'd turned out to be just as gorgeous and well-endowed as she'd visualized so many times before. It made her blush, and he took note of her rosy complexion.

"Don't tell me you're getting shy now," he teased her, seemingly unruffled at having been bare in front of her eyes. "I'm not shy," she corrected him, pursing her lips in frisky annoyance.

"Oh, yeah?" His witty utterance was gesticulated by the way he grabbed hold of the slits underneath her knees, tugging her closer to his evident stiffness whilst folding her limbs back to expose her sex entirely. She moaned softly at having been yanked in such a sudden and immodest motion, biting her lip as she gazed up at him with clouded eyes of eagerness.

No more hesitation or second-guessing interrupted the following moments of their connection, her arousal slick enough to let him glide past her folds with no other form of lubrication. The twinge of pain she'd felt as she stretched to his girth made her jump ever so slightly, at which he paused his actions immediately and directed his attention to her face. "I'm fine, it's just been a while," she breathed an assurance eagerly, craving the sensation for him to reach her at a more comfortable depth, despite how she clenched him. "I can tell," his response is heavy with controlled desire before he continues his previous motion. “Just let me know if it hurts."

Though even if it were to cause her any pain, she was certain it would not have been enough to put an end to such a beautiful yet lecherous moment. Once fully submerged, he appeared to have cast all carefulness aside, overtaken by the tightness of her insides gripping his shaft. He struggled to maintain a leisurely pace, digging his thumbs into the underside of her slender yet ample thighs as he eventually figured it innocuous enough to pound her with more vigor and force.

She responded gratefully, throwing her head back into the blanket with a licentious moan. Initially, she tried to keep her sounds of delectation at a minimum, but the way he manipulated his rhythm and stroke forced her to disregard any civility she was still holding onto. He seemed to enjoy it even more so when she got loud, watching her immodest expressions and bouncing breasts each time he thrust into her. At some point, he'd removed himself entirely before plunging back inside of the gaping hole formed by his girth several times, simulating a suction-like pull. The visual was unbearably sexy and he willed himself not to get off before she did.

For the next several minutes, the only thing to be heard was slight curses, moaning, and heavy breathing, accompanied by the occasional squelching of her sticky arousal. Akane had never experienced such a relation to the degree that she was now. Slightly parted lips revealed her relish at being — for lack of a better word — fucked by him.

At some point, she'd found his chest to be nearly parallel to her own, his breath exhaling onto her earlobe with each forward impel of his hips while his hair occasionally fondled her cheek. Her arms flew to embrace him, fingernails mindlessly digging into the flesh of his broad shoulders as she dragged them down to his tailbone, leaving tinted, red streaks. This, he was particularly fond of.

"Fuck...scratch me harder."

She'd always taken him for one to find pleasure in his pain, but it was not eccentric in the least bit. In fact, she found herself enjoying his masochistic dispositions quite a bit.

She scraped her nails down his back again, obeying his request to roughen her friction against his skin. He moaned relatively more intense than before, palms closing around her waist to bring himself back to his earlier position above her. Hair stuck to his forehead and temples, muscles glistening in sweat as he offered a more gravelly appearance, his eyes narrowed slightly in a passionate trance. All because of her. The sight made her quiver, and she knew it wouldn't be long before she'd reached the apex of satisfaction.

"Please, harder...Shinya..."

And her wish was his only command. Somehow hearing her beg so politely for him to tear into her even more as she squirmed in impatience made him delirious, violent even. Her fists grappled at the sheets as he accelerated his strokes, her torso curling as she sat up as much as this new pattern of gut-prodding excellence would allow her to.

"I would've- fucked you sooner if I knew- you wanted it this bad."

His dirty words came through a series of breaths, pushing her further towards her climax as she threw her head back in sheer ecstasy. As crude as it was, a part of her couldn't deny that she would've dropped her panties for him long before tonight on that day she'd seen him training. The thought intoxicated her even more, and the warmth spreading throughout her lower half suddenly confirmed that she couldn't prolong herself anymore.

She didn't need to verbalize it; her body language relayed that message quite clearly.

He called her bashful efforts to shield her face from his sight before her hands had barely moved, immobilizing them at the wrists on either side of her head as he stared down at the glorious, messy sight of a woman before him.

“Don’t hide from me.”

His dominance subjected her to submit to her pleasure, a deluge of sexual euphoria flowing throughout her nerves as she writhed through her long-awaited orgasm, moaning his name over and over amongst other incoherent sounds that nudged him towards his evident end.

The pulsing of her heated, gripping flesh around his shaft willed him to slow his pace, feeling the undeniable pressure build within his abdomen until it convulsed in a torrent of abrupt intervals. His onset climax had nearly obliterated the desire for him to remove himself once he'd felt the familiar eruption. Nonetheless, it would have been selfish of him to do something so bold. He knew he was playing a risky game.

As he pulled out with not a breath more to spare, hot, thick liquid emitted first onto her center, sliding down near the cavernous hole of her entrance that was now pulsing. He watched his seed leak down her puckered folds to the curved surface of her bottom, admiring the dishonorable sight he’d managed to make of her in the afterglow of his orgasm. Her lips were smiling, and for a second he'd allowed himself to smile back.

But it was only a matter of time before this moment ended, and end it did.

She didn't want to feel disconcerted after such an immaculate time, but her afterthoughts consumed her and it was apparent as the ecstatic expression on her face slowly vanished.

Fingers reached out without warning to grab him by the dog tags that dangled from around his neck, drawing him closer until he'd abruptly encircled her within his solid arms, squeezing her tightly. He rolled over to allow her head to settle below his collarbone, one leg intertwined with his.

It felt good, but this wasn't a lighthearted reunion.

Rather, it was more of a bittersweet goodbye. A final gesture, closure, a last-minute "don't forget about me." It stung her deeply to know that out of all the other seven billion people in the world, he'd always been the one out there that was never destined to be hers. It made her ponder why fate had brought them together at all, and she figured she would have learned something from it by now. But her mind was numb and void of an answer.

Sometimes there never really was an answer.

It was just the way things were meant to be, and she had to stop convincing herself that it could've been different.

She knew he loved her. But it hurt too much for her to admit that she loved him, too.

She'd thought back to his words: fulfill your duty with no mercy.

Had she truly fulfilled anything?

It didn't matter anymore. Slumber was sure to overpower her.

She could feel the warmth of his body against hers, the rising of his chest each time his lungs expanded, the thorough beating of his heart.

She had managed to accomplish an impermanent period of temporary fulfillment and euphoria. After all was said and done, she couldn't bear to stomach the idea that they would probably never see each other again. Their encounter had given life to commencement so exquisite, and she was struck with the epiphany that this moment was testing her. Except for this time, she did not want to fail. 

"Let's leave." 

Her proposition was met with an absence of a response, but his eyes flicked to her as she'd raised herself slightly on his chest. 

"Akane-"

"Please, I want this," there was desperation in her voice as she uttered the words, "can you think about somebody other than yourself for once?" 

He hadn't suspected that his absence in her life had taken such a profound toll on her mind, and he knew she couldn't have possibly been thinking clearly to reach such an unreasonable conclusion. But Kogami craved her presence too much to take heed of any cognitive dissonance. 

"If you missed me that much, you should've come and got me sooner." 

His rejoinder offered mitigation to the burning reality of having to live without him, and she graciously placed her lips against his, kissing him ardently for a long while. 

"I just hope you won't regret it." 

**Author's Note:**

> And there you have it! I hope some parts weren't too unoriginal Gskdfksh I just really loved how the writers portrayed certain scenes in the movie ugh
> 
> lyrics are Milky Chance's "Stolen Dance" <3


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